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“What are you doing all the way out here?”

“What are you doing all the way out here?” I asked her as we both shirked from the cold wind.

She started to tell me and then stopped, “Hey, wait I know you. You’re the lady who gave me that bread that you dip into that juice in that tall cup.”

“That’s right,” I smiled realizing I had recognized her before she had recognized me. “You know the cold weather shelter is open tonight. Don’t you want to go there where it’s warm?”

“There’s too much drama there,” she explained.

I hesitated not knowing at all what to say. Wasn’t it worth enduring drama to be warm? It was below freezing outside, surely it was worth dealing with people so that you didn’t have to sleep outside.

“There’s always someone who is looking for a fight and it’s just not worth it,” she continued.

I was trying really hard to understand where she was coming from, to understand the world as she saw it, knowing that privilege was hindering a connection. I was trying to respect her voice and choice, knowing that telling her what she should do would disrespect her humanity in ways she had experienced over and over again.

I had seen first hand what she was talking about, people in desperate situations guarding their reputations and their identities fiercely. I knew she was speaking truth, but I also knew there was no way┬áI’d ever completely understand.

A humbling realization.

She had seen more death than I had seen. She had felt more desperation than I had seen. She had felt more hunger than I had. There was a gap that divided us, a gap I’ve been working for eight month not to eliminate or justify or defend, but simply understand.

But maybe on Wednesday I would see her again and that gap would be bridged for just a moment as we worshipped and fellowshipped and celebrated the Lord’s supper together, side by side.

  • MaineArts

    Dear Merianna Harrelson,

    I happened across your page by chance ( or maybe not, “chance”).

    In any case, I hope I can find you on Facebook. I think a topic that is rarely spoken of in churches and one that needs public awareness is the respect for out animal kingdom.

    In particular, I would like to see trapping and chasing down (and killing wildlife) with packs of hound dogs…end. Both are such cruel things to do to a sentient being…and worse of all, it is done out of ignorance of the animal and “sport” (fun).

    Ironically, there is nothing “sporting” about it…and some think it fun to watch pit-bulls fight. Siccing packs of hound dogs on a lone coyote is neither. And I am sure it reduces Jesus to tears, to see what we are doing to his Animal Kingdom.

    To hunt and kill an animal for food is one thing…but to sic another animal on a living, feeling being ( enjoying the chase and kill ) is horrific and it needs to be discussed and ended. People who are doing this are not Christians.

    So. Please be aware. Just like children…animals have “no voice”; they have “no choice.” We are their stewards. http://www.projectcoyote.org/mediaroom/videos/artist-for-wild-nature-virginia-maria-romero/